She Charged Her Husband for Dishes—And Honestly? I Love It.
Because love isn’t a financial plan.
We’ve all heard the horror stories.
Stay-at-home moms left with nothing.
No job.
No savings.
No resume.
Just a long list of invisible labor and years of love and sacrifice—unrecognized, unpaid, and unrecoverable when a relationship ends.u keep your financial future in view while nurturing tiny humans?
I recently came across an Instagram video that made me stop and smile.
A woman who’s a stay-at-home mom charges her husband for household tasks.
Laundry? Fee.
Dishes? Fee.
Cooking dinner? Yep, that’s got a price tag too.
And if he wants to save money?
He’s welcome to do it himself.
It sounds cheeky—but it’s brilliant.
Because what she’s really doing is making the invisible visible.
She’s naming the labor.
She’s valuing her time.
She’s setting a boundary.
It struck a chord because I’ve lived the other side of that story.
I was a stay-at-home mom for a few years.
I didn’t work. I wasn’t saving. I wasn’t upleveling my skills.
Meanwhile, my partner was doing all of that.
Then we split—and I was left starting over with two kids and no financial cushion.
Looking back, I wish I’d protected myself better.
Not because I didn’t love my family, but because love isn’t a financial plan.
So let’s talk about it:
How do you divide money fairly when one person’s doing most of the caregiving?
How do you keep your financial future in view while nurturing tiny humans?
What systems can support both partners during and after the reproductive years?
Maybe you’re not charging your partner for folding laundry—but you deserve to be part of the financial equation.
HERE ARE SOME IDEAS FOR DIVIDING YOUR FINANCES AS A STAY AT HOME PARENT:
💸 1. Stipend or “Salary” Agreement
A couple agrees on a set monthly amount the SAHM receives—like a paycheck.
This can be:
A personal spending allowance
A set amount transferred into their personal savings account
Calculated based on average costs of child care, house cleaning, etc.
💡 Example: "We agreed I’d receive $2,000/month, based on the cost of daycare + a cleaner."
💼 2. Shared Access to All Family Funds
Instead of one partner controlling the finances, both have full access to joint accounts and decision-making.
This recognizes caregiving as equal in value to income-earning.
💡 Important: This works best with open communication, mutual respect, and regular financial check-ins.
📈 3. Build Personal Savings or Retirement
The earning partner contributes to a personal savings account, IRA, or investment fund in the SAHM’s name.
This protects long-term security and makes sure she’s not left behind financially.
🧾 4. Task-Based “Charging” (like the Instagram trend)
This playful-yet-serious strategy assigns costs to invisible labor:
Laundry: $15/load
Cooking: $30/day
Errands: $20/hour
Childcare: $25/hour
While not everyone actually “pays” these amounts, tallying them up can start a conversation about the economic value of this work—and who’s bearing the weight of it.
🧾 5. Prenups, Postnups, or Family Agreements
Some couples draft legal or written agreements about compensation, savings, or spousal support in case of divorce. This might include:
Guaranteed lump sum after X years of caregiving
Access to shared assets
Legal recognition of financial contributions through unpaid labor
🧠 6. Skill-Building Budget + Time
Another form of financial safeguarding: the working partner ensures the SAHM has time and funds to pursue skill-building, certification, or part-time income opportunities—even if it’s slow, seasonal, or symbolic.
💡This strategy is about long-term empowerment. This is the kind of stuff we workshop inside The Beehive—real-life, messy, important conversations about womanhood, partnership, money, and motherhood.
We help each other think bigger, protect what matters, and soften without sacrificing our power.
If that sounds like the circle you’ve been craving, come check it out.
👉🏻 Join The Beehive or learn more here.
Because it’s not just about dishes. It’s about safeguarding for when life takes unexpected turns.
a women’s health visionary, pelvic health specialist, and mother of two. I’m passionate about helping women soften into their strength through restorative practices, community, and holistic support. Whether you’re navigating fertility, pregnancy, postpartum, or beyond, I’m here to guide you in reconnecting with your body and thriving in every season of life. Grab a cup of tea and join me on this journey!